What is in a name? what is an identity? yeah some of you will tell me that a name is your identity but that is the same as saying that all drugs are medicine. Relax, me the Deity of my Universe of Infinite I am not going to deal in the mechanics of what identity is.. Rather I am going to touch on the superficial areas of it..
I am an anime fan and my best anime to date is Naruto. Masashi Kishimoto wrote or rather drew or whatever tickles your fancy, a plot that relates to me 100%. From wanting to be acknowledged, to loving people who don’t want you, to wanting to change the world. My favourite character is Uchiha Itachi. His genjutsu or illusionary technique using his Sharingan(An Uchiha kekke genkai or bloodline) is one called Limited Tsukuyomi. There is a more powerful version of it that is possible by reviving the Ten tails beast and its called Infinite Tsukuyomi.. Basically here everyone is trapped in the alternate fantasy universe where there is no war according to antagonist Uchiha Madara. He has the right concept but the wrong means. Even Uchiha Sasuke wanted to have the Tsukuyomi where he instead controls everything. Is it just me or are the Uchihas just power craving selfish prats just like The emperor in Akame ga Kill.. The exception of course is Itachi Uchiha, go watch the anime or read the manga and you will understand. Anyway my allusion to the Tsukuyomi is this, I too have a Tsukuyomi jutsu only that mine is personal. Instead of trying to control all mankind to peace, I create my own Tsukuyomi and there I create new things people and law; hence my title Deity of Universe of Infinite. So my first identity is Deity.
Next up is my human aspect of it. I guess I am the most unfortunate being born during this times. One I was given a highly functioning brain. That is where all my problems begin. I already acknowledge my existence and with it I also know my position in the chain of life; or as it is called the pecking order of things. Now to counter the effects I am forced to have different personalities just to protect myself. I am an introvert by birth and nature. I love my alone time but because of my awareness I know that I need some human interactions to keep me sane. So I switch personalities to a mode that will enable me socialize with you humans. However that is a very emotionally draining activity. So once again I switch to nerd mode where I can still interact with humans and still remain sane in a controlled environment.
At times though I don’t want to be seen or recognised because I know my place in life. Just like Uchiha Obito who when asked by Naruto whom he was, he replied that he was nobody. Most of the time I feel that way too. Don’t get me wrong I do want to have friends, in fact I want to have a friend who’ll stick with me always and whom I too can be needed by. I might never be loved or even love but the feeling of being needed is the second best option to experiencing love. I have tried my hand at the love thing and yes it is appealing but however, kissing too many frogs to get your prince or princess charming is tiresome. Besides that requires intense human interactions and I am just not ready to start a full scale socialising programme. The friends or rather nodding acquaintances I have are really not interested in me that much. Yes I can hear you quite clearly, am I putting the effort myself. I am and have but now, I accept my position that I wasn’t meant to have such friends.
I have this accept things as they come mentality; If I am to die tomorrow then so be it. If I am to be injured tomorrow then so be it. It is said prepare for the worst but expect the best right? Well I prepare for the worst and expect it.. Am I a cynic? Am i a pessimist? You decide but it doesn’t change anything. All in all since I am embracing my negativity it makes me stronger. I sound just like an antagonist right? Well I might be.. Anyway by now you have seen my other identity, right?
If I see a bleeding cat and a bleeding child, which will I tend to first? You say the child, right? Using the two which will I feel more pity to? The child right? WRONG…. Yes out of my obligation as a human I will tend to the child first but my heart is more inclined to the animal. Humans especially of this age and era are just selfish beings both on physical and all other levels. With humans it is all about me me, I I.. At least with animals I expect that kind of thinking and so I am more inclined to them. In fact animals are less selfish and are excused for any wrongs they do because they are instictual creations. Humans have brains that they use yet it is always about self.. My other identity has surfaced as you can notice now.
I want to continue on so many aspects of my identity but I will stop here for now. This post should be a guide on how to interact with me should we ever bump into each other. If we don’t, the better..