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Archive for the ‘Satire’ Category

Of Financial Institutions

This is one troubled Deity and I need no piety – pun intended.. I have noticed a disturbing trend on this blue-green mass of rock.. My gigai of late just can’t take it.. What am I ranting and raving about this time round?. The general elections of a certain country? Nope I don’t give a hoot about human affairs as I haven’t yet established any diplomatic relations with your human countries and at this rate I doubt I will.. There are so many pills for me to take for the so many ills that are there..
No today I want to talk about the financial institutions- banks especially.. Now I am not going to talk about how they have exorbitant interest rates that only deepen their bellies and deep pockets.. No, I am going to talk about their customer care.. My gigai being fraternity of the hospitality industry I believe that I have the right to talk about it.. I remember a certain local back that claims to be EQUITable- I used to bank with it.. Once when I went to follow up on an issue on my account I was taken to see the customer care desk.. I remember asking the agent what was the difference between a MasterCard and Visa.. He seriously told me with his many years in the banking industry that with MasterCard I could pay fare with it.. That was the difference!. Even my two year old daughter wouldn’t fall for such a lie.. Imagine the cheek!. I left with my remaining dignity and swore never to go back again.. At least Google will tell you a smarter lie..

Now today just some hours ago as I headed to my bank- a different one mind you one that claimed that it is a Diamond Trust one- I went for a different issue one involving my banking app PIN.. The agent I met at the desk was kind enough to tell me she has no idea about how the app works- I wonder what happened to training new staff on products and services offered at your company.. So she went to her friend who was a bank teller.. Now the bank teller was helpful enough to tell me in a voice reserved for kindergarten kids that I should I dial a certain short code as if I didn’t know that.. I looked at her affronted and left because when the system told me I should visit a certain branch the AI wasn’t stupid otherwise it would have told me to simply dial the USSD short code..
At least the only bank that hasn’t down me such crass stupidity is the one that lives to Chase around and I love their customer service; it is so personalized.. Back at my UI we really don’t need baking institutions so this deity really doesn’t get how the system works here on this crappy blue planet..

Until next time from a man of the people, deity of the universe of infinite and disconcerted banking client stay safe..
PS: Please stop with the killings and kidnappings during this election period.. It’ll affect the economy negatively..

OF SOCIAL MEDIA & MEDIUMS

Yes I am at it again, another rant and rave of your only Deity of the Universe of Infinite. I was going to brush this under the carpet but when it affected my gigai I couldn’t turn a deaf eye nor a blind ear to the matter anymore. Want to guess what my issue is? Guess you wouldn’t given a million years. Before I vent my frustration at the regression of the human race more specifically the Sapiens sapiens species, let us take a short walk through History. Yes yes, I am allowed to do that as Time falls under Infinity. And no it isn’t time travel so wipe that Mephistophelean smile off your face, I don’t want to have real live Dr. Whos and Rose Tylers.

The year will be 1876 and the smart ones already know. Yes your mental projections will be visiting Sir Alexander Graham Bell; the father of the telephone. The Aegyptopithecus to the smart phone you hold in your palm now. He patented the first practical working telephone. However, though the inventor or not depending on what history you listen to, he found the telephone a nuisance and kept it in his study. Though not evolved he could still see its danger.

Fast forward to the future. Now I know many of you are sharpening your pitchforks and stoking the fire ready for a witch-hunt or more appropriately a deity hunt, hoping to catch me and roast me well well-done. I would tell you to save your energy but you wouldn’t listen. Just like all the witches you burned during the Dark Ages who lied to you they died?

Tags, more so #tags are my pet peeve. The humans of this era are so into their Smartphone that one would be forgiven for thinking that Smartphones are their deities while in realty they are theirs stakes.

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Likes comments and hash tags are the lifeline of such. When Bell made the telephone, he had no idea that the # would gain such prominence. Even the * button isn’t that button anymore. All that is left is for all mobile phones to unanimously agree that there should be a dedicated # button like the windows key on most comps

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#Bell #telephony #Blogging #Writinginbed #Coffee #cofeeholic #Righthandwriting #Multitasking #Textingbae #history #research #MondayBlues #BedManenos #PhilosophicalTings (Yes I wrote tings instead of things) #MyBrainBetterThanYours #WritingIsBae #BloggingIsBae #ThoughtsUnderAMosquitoNet #AfterSundayTings #I’mSoSmart #HP #TypingInBed #DUI #DILLIC?

Yes all those #tags apply to this gigai as he types away. Seriously? You don’t #GiveADamn and I #Don’tCare. Very soon, the # in any tag shall be counted as a separate word in essays et al. #Change.

Look, you might think that #tagging makes you look all cool and such but honey baby, honey is only delicious to lick the first four times after that you get sick of it. It just shows your; yes your level of intellect and maturity is at #AllTimeLow. Yes some #tags do actually help a cause but only one out of every say 100? The rest are just piles upon piles of egotistical, egocentric, extrovert, self-seeking, selfish tags. (Feel free to #tag each individual word.) This reminds me of a certain dance movie I watched, where in the dance camp there was this super famous dance crew and the lead #tagged everything. As you can guess I didn’t finish watching the movie.

#MirrorNotLie #BathroomSelfies are some of the more annoying tags I encounter on a daily basis. Since you can’t beat them let me add a few #tags and hope they will pick pace and trend okay? #LavatoryLove #FaecalFacts #GOTPeeson1 #CeramicThrone #ShittySounds #Dr.Poo #GreatFartscapade Do I continue or stop? So far three main sites are responsible for the #tag phenomena HeadBook the Social networking site, that chirping micro blogging site Chirp Chirp! With its red sparrow and the extroverts’ paradise InstaGlam the photo-showcasing site.

Post photos all you like but don’t make the #tags take up more space than the photo itself. If the madness had been contained in the Internet I would not be really mad but when it spills over to WorstApp I scream. Then some of you have #tags so ingrained in you that even in SMSs I receive #Mpesa #OkoaJahazi #Kisses #IKR #I’mSleepy, and my agent sends a text saying “End month is approaching #RentCollectionManenos”, this is where as the Deity of the Universe of Infinite I become stark raving mad. #tags in texts? Come on! What next? #tags in speech and conversation.

 

Sandra: Hi dad so I managed to create the mountain ranges in the third planet though not as high as the Himalayas

Me: Hi there Sandra I am proud of you. #FatherDaughterIntellect I see. Well you are the daughter of the #DUI

Sandra: Uhm Okay. By the way your citizens miss you already they ask when will you be back.

Me: I #Miss them too. Tell them tomorrow is a #PublicHoliday and they can have #FunTime with #Family #Friends and #Bae.

Sandra: Okay I will try and do that but are you okay?

Me: I definitely am #Healthy just #WorkingOut #NoDoctor.

Sandra: Dad are you sure you haven’t caught one of those weird human diseases? What’s with all the #tagging in our conversation?

Me: #NeverBeenBetter #JustSpeakingLocalLanguage #GottaGo #LoveYou and #TTYL

She hung up on me before I got to the #GottaGo tag.  That conversation was not only #Ridiculous but also #Crazy #Insanity #Idiotic. She sent me a #tag free text telling me that she predicts that human communication shall revert to grunts, hieroglyphs and cave paintings very soon. Your voice boxes shall become vestigial organs and your mouths shall be for eating and maybe kissing if any of you shall remember how to do it. But I am sure you will just Googol it. Not that #ICare what happens to the #HumanRace. It is your pathetic miserable lives anyway not mine.

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Until Next time from your Introverted yet Man of the People and Observant Deity of the Universe of Infinite and Hashtag free being:

 

#GOODBYE

High-Lights and Low-Darks of 2015

Okay so this is another rant and rave of no one else but your favourite deity of the universe of infinite, only that this time round it is a wrap up of the year 2015..

I’m still stuck on this crabby planet as my SPIRIT beam is still sulking; and my daughter,is still trying to open a safe portal for me to use.. Well by June 2016 I will have finally succeeded in going back to my universe for good, so I will not rely on my SPIRIT beam any more.. Other than that let us get down to it..

So this year has had its Everests and Marianas Trenches. By that I mean there have been more downs than ups.. Take the Everest and turn it upside down to cover or fill the Marianas you’ll still need roughly 2000 metres more.. hope I’ve explained it in layman’s terms..

Most of The Thoughts Of A……. series have been me spotlighting issues that have really ticked me off.. Primarily these have been the downs in my life.. Also if you are discerning enough, read between the lines of most of my posts and you’ll see something..

I landed on this crabby planet and slightly loved it, got myself a gigai with which I have been able to interact with the beings on this planet.

In June, the month when I self-procreated myself, I made three new friends, two of whom I still maintain regular contact with. Fellow wine and food enthusiasts like myself. Although I left my previous workplace during that time, a month later I was summoned to the place I am now. Go through my posts to read about it all. Also this gigai happened to meet Jean Wandimi a fellow blogger and also a master class wine enthusiast (I am just a disciple class wine enthusiast) at my work place and I totally loved it. I think this was the only time that this D.U.I. became a fan, pushimg aside my introvert cloak for a few minutes. If you are a wine connoisseur then follow this

http://thewineandfoodreview.com

Speaking of my new workplace, I met a certain Temporary All Rounded person there and to date she is a very special person. For your information, my favourite manga character is Nagi Sanzenin of Hayate no Gotoku. This person is my Nagi Chan, my Ojousama, so I have a very soft spot for Nagi and she knows it too.. I think to date she is the only Venetian who plays a mind game with me that I actually love. I hate mind games exception being chess.

However the Venetian species, I note love playing mind games all the time. Too bad for them I happen to be the D.U.I. and also have a highly functioning brain so usually I manage to know their game plans and prepare myself; after all isn’t fore-footed forewarned, or something like that?. However, with my Ojousama I love her mind games as it has a pleasant aura around it. She doesn’t have KI (Killing Intent) around her though her mind game is more of a duel between us; our weapons fencing swords. We attack, defend, parry, thrust et al, but in the end we both love it.

I stumbled away from my literature universe onto the Anime and Manga-Verse.. Well I don’t see myself leaving anytime soon, I think I will station an embassy in that universe for proper diplomatic relations.. Keep in mind that I had done a few reconnaissance trips when I was much younger but it was just that.. However now I’d like to colonise- ahem maintain proper relations with this newly discovered world.. I just can’t get enough of expanding my universe of Infinite.. I think it was proper I became the Deity of the Universe of Infinite. With Music, Prose, Poetry, Dance, I’m very close to controlling the Nine Muses of Greek. Terpsichore, Clio, Euterpe and Melpomene so far are under my thumb. Very soon the whole of the Arts shall be part of my Universe of Infinite.

Then there are smaller achievements, like getting myself a new pair of state of the art Sharingans, my previous ones were really old having them for over 13 years.. Speaking of 13, There were so many Friday the 13th this year but only the last one had any significance to me. For that short period I was able to temporarily travel back to my Universe and spend quality time with my daughter.

Also, when we had the Super moon I was temporarily able to summon a few of my universe representatives to this planet. I’m sorry I didn’t tell anyone about this but after reading this post I’m sure you’ll understand why.

Another up was when the earth time here was the truncated form of PI this date exact

.. that should be proclaimed an inter-universal holiday, a once in a century holiday, along the lines of sighting of Haley’s Comet.. In my U.I. it is a special day, where all creation not only rest but their infinite wishes are infinitely answered for that specific time period only..

This year has also been one where I’ve been too socially active, having exceeded my quota by light years. An AA meet, ComicCon, over five different social lunches with people never met before, I mean any introverted being like myself would have died by now, so for 2016 I want to limit these social outings to the number of fingers on my foot.. Exactly your feet don’t have fingers but toes, you get the message loud and clear, you potential Social ticks and fleas, stay away from me in the name of the D.U.I.

From all my other posts, you know I am a very jealous deity so if any of you are expecting me to wish you a prosperous 2016, you’ll keep on waiting until infinity will stop being undefined; and as along as I am the Deity of the universe of Infinite and my daughter is still well my daughter then too bad that is not happening anytime soon.. Reason being that New Year’s is a festival honouring the two-faced Roman God Janus; after whom the month of January was named. Now if I cant trust a two faced human, what about a two-timing double dealing Roman god? Therefore I will not wish you a happy New Year..

My New Years resolution? None at all, I will just be more active in the day to day operations of my Prose-theticular universe. Meaning more stories will be written for 2016, so yeah that’s good news.

Here is a guide on how we should relate this coming year: https://kaywill112.wordpress.com/2015/03/04/random-words-of-deity-of-infinite

Other than that let us crossover like chiasmata into the New Year and see you in 2016..

From your usual Deity of the Universe of Infinite, Man of the People, Soon to be Controller of the Nine Muses, and Upper Class Tier Citizen, Sayonara 2015 and shinnen omedetō gozaimasu minna san..

Of Annoying Travel Habits

Okay so this is another rant and rave of no one else but your favourite deity of the universe of infinite..

I’m still stuck on this crabby planet as my SPIRIT beam is still sulking; and my daughter,is still trying to open a safe portal for me to use..

Hence while around I have to put up with human peculiarities and eccentricities.. Now due to the limitations of my gigai I don’t have access to my second favourite mode of personal transport. My first is teleportation; what did you expect? Deities love teleporting considering it is one of the few black areas in human scientific progression.. My second is slipstream.. I actually made this up for those days when I am too lazy to teleport..

What is slipstream?. Well slipstreaming is on earth the concept where you travel directly behind something ahead of you to reduce air friction, right?. Well Slipstream is the same except this time I manipulate gravity. Gravity in this case instead of pulling and holding me down it goes ahead of me and instead pulls me forward.. All it requires is telepathic connection.. Its like a burst of speed or a nitrous boost.. I think you can loosely compare it to Body Flicker Technique or Shunpo (flash step) though Slipstream is using gravity to thy advantage..

So anyway back to my issue as I can’t use Slipstream I have to be content with PTS- public transport systems.. Now where I am currently there are this 14-seater and 33-seater minivans that ferry people from point A to Z- or something like that..

Well I boarded one and sat at the window seat per se.. Now my gigai is relatively small so I don’t take much space, however, some people take that as an excuse to encroach on me personal space (see previous post).. So this humungous Cyclops decides to set his corpse next to me. He eats up his share of the seat and takes up half of mine. Then he opens his legs wide. I can’t take it so I put up resistance and open the window wide open. Usually I open the window to tick off people.. I noticed that you humans love shutting the windows when the vehicle is moving. Well I leave the window open and usually when someone asks me to shut the window, I smile at them and innocently say the window is stuck. The result is usually they move to another seat. Then there are those hot headed imbeciles who mannerlessly shut the window without asking me. Well I mannerlessly open it again and glare at the perpetrator. Again I achieve the same result. Next time you sit next to me and notice I open the window just know you aren’t welcome.

Mr. Cyclops noticed my resistance and he tried to behave. Fortunately he alighted later on. Unfortunately I had another issue in the same vehicle. Have you ever noticed how, smelly socks and chips travel faster than sound in an enclosed area?. Well someone and I assume a Venetian was eating chips and the smell engulfed the vehicle; that was another reason I opened the window. Now I have no problem with eating food but please be conscious of others. Maybe some are allergic to your food, or maybe you are rubbing salt to someone’s wounds by eating in a vehicle and yet the person is fasting either willingly or unwillingly.

If you must really eat in a public vehicle, there are snacks for that matter. By snacks I mean sweets, chewing gum, chocolates, crisps, biscuits and cookies et al. No I will not mention cakes.

Now that brings me to another weird habit. Why would a grown person after chewing gum, place it under the seat of the vehicle?. Or inside the seat cover? Then also those of you (me excluded) who happen to find those gums in those hard to reach areas, just what were you doing there in the first place?. Along that line, there was a time it was mandatory for PTS to have wastebaskets in them. I wonder why?. I have issues with someone who after unwrapping their goods decides to dump the wrapper in the vehicle. Mys bag has a compartment for my trash. I hate littering I’d rather carry it in my bag then drop it off at the nearest trash site.

Another pet peeve, you newspaper readers, text readers and basically jobless passengers. Now I am not the type to read newspapers in a PTS because one I never buy them, I read them at work. However, I once sat next to a pretty Venetian who was reading a paper, and no I wasn’t reading along with her. I fund it rude to read someone else’s paper.. However, the Venetian had the paper spread open covering my left leg and to make matters worse I saw her sneaking glances at me to see whether I was reading it too.. Why do that?. I mean just open the paper and then fold it and read in peace. That’s why I love reading novels in PTS.

Next, are basically your secret phone reviewers. I mean what else can I call someone who reads your texts or watches whatever you’re doing on your OWN phone?. Even as I am typing this I happen to have quite an audience of a Venetian.. I understand that travelling in a vehicle is really boring at times, but if you have nothing to do please don’t do it next to me. I love my privacy and seeing you constantly checking my phone surreptitiously is tantamount to stalking and privacy invasion. Next time carry a book or something to keep your idle mind occupied. Or like I do, carry your earphones and plug them in to your handset and listen to either your playlist or the radio.

Speaking of that, there are some certain people who think that we all want to listen to their music, so they’ll honour us by playing their music on speaker.. I mean come on if I wanted loud music I’d definitely not board a quiet peaceful bus.

Along that line, I know that some of us are pretty important people, importing cars, or having contacts with important and powerful people in society. I mean, hey I am Deity of the Universe of Infinite too so I understand your undying and life-threatening need to broadcast to every Tom Dick and Harriette about your life. But please try to control those impulsive urges. Some of us are really not interested in listening to your ‘Interesting’ life in buses. If you really must, then start a reality show like the Kardashians..
Some time back I happened to sit at the back right of a 14-seater PTS vehicle. A lady dressed in an office suit next to me and a young man sat at the back left. When the lady alighted I happened to be looking out and I saw the young man pull it his phone and discreetly lower it to the ladies hemline, camera side up. Yes he was taking a panty-shot of the lady. I just looked straight ahead asking myself whether I was taking part in an Ecchi manga. The guy was older than me and yet doing such high school antics. The lady never noticed, fortunately for him. However you Venetians need to be on the lookout for ecchi people out there..
Preachers. Yes you so called preachers. I have nothing wrong with you propagating your religious views but please not in the PTS and definitely not in the morning. Some of us are still sleepy. And funny enough why is it only Christian preachers on board?. I’m yet to see a Muslim preacher in a bus or even better a Hindu, Sikh, Shinto, Tao or Traditional African preachers doing their share too.. If that’s it I think I, being a deity should also start a preaching campaign in PTS though I really don’t know what my followers will be worshipping. ‘Cause I am just a humble deity, not seeking recognition anywhere.

Back to the preachers, do they all assume that all passengers on board are of one religion, denomination or even believe in the existence of a heavenly beings?. To prevent poisoning of my mind, I started walking with earphones all over. In fact once or twice I irked some preachers by looking directly in their eyes and putting on my earphones. One of them even commented saying, “some of you are now putting on their earphones but God’s….” I managed to press play. I don’t mean to be rude but I am a jealous deity. I definitely am not going to listen to the sermons from another god. There is a reason why I am “Deity of the Universe of Infinite”.

The worst habit of all are the conversationistas.. And there are two types.

Type Alpha: These type are loudmouthed individuals who talk to everyone from their seat. Meaning they shout and have loud banter with everyone. These type are very dangerous because they get everyone talking about whatever topic they bring up. Be it ball, politics, or the latest social issue they know it all. Typically they are extroverts. Good thing is I usually drown them out of my hearing with my ever handy earphones.

Type Beta: These type are the most dangerous to me. Yes they are your seat mates in the PTS who strike a conversation with you. My mama taught me never to talk to strangers. My introversion teaches me mot to talk to anyone unless really needed.. So when you nonchalantly start talking to me I get bored.. Hello! The earphones are usually conversation stoppers. But on the rare occasion that you manage to chat me up before this deity plugs in then know that I’m just too kind to turn you off..
Well until next time ciao..

Of Money and Relationships

They say money can’t buy you love, nor happiness.. The best it can do is buy you pseudo love and pseudo happiness.. All that is true but also money can make you lose precious gems like nakama..
Well at least in my case..
There was a girl I really liked back and we hit it off on good footing but she left me and though I was given a shoddy reason that couldn’t hold water. The real reason though that I knew, was that she saw I didn’t have the amount of money that she wanted.. Too harsh, eh?.
Okay lemme tone down the story and take a different perspective. Two years back where I was working, one of our usual clients became friends with me. Well I even knew her place and twice she brought me cooked food to enjoy. Other times after closing shop I’d head to her place to deliver her purchases and we’d end up watching a movie and eating before I headed home.. Some of the purchases were either on high discount rates or on credit. She did tale her time to pay them all back though. But what ticked me off was she took something on credit and took over 6 months to pay back. I had to pay the business back with my own cash and follow up on her. Sadly, because of that, I lost her as a friend. Yeah I know don’t mix business and friendship. Also I wasn’t stupid, I knew she wanted us to be friends so that she could benefit but I naïvely thought that she had a good side, well that wasn’t the case. Though I don’t want to judge her and neither should you.
That isn’t an isolated case though, I’ve had quite a few other encounters along the same line. And all didn’t end happily ever after.
Well now you think that I am naïve and maybe it is true, however I prefer nakama over money.. It is the little things in life that are enjoyable and that is what I treasure so if money will cause friction between me and nakama then I’d rather not have money.. I hear some of you say that in case don’t help out with money in the first place- well there are two big hurdles with that.
First, I am naïve and because of that I love helping people out. When someone comes to me for help, I actually I’m very happy. They say that humans need to be loved, but for me in my case, the feeling of being needed supersedes love. I’m not saying that I help to be recognised, on the contrary I prefer doing things incognito. That is so because I am very bad when it comes to handling and receiving praise and gratitude. I’m an introvert hence I’m an objective type of person. Truthfully, most of the time when I help out it isn’t because I care much, only because I can.. Sounds contradictory, right?.
Secondly, I am a very lousy liar especially when asked a direct question. Even if I lie it will be pretty obvious to all and sundry so I can’t lie that I can’t help you.
The lending part isn’t an issue for me, it is the debt recovery part that is. If it is my fellow Martian I can easily, ask for it and in case things get ugly then a few punches will suffice. After that we resume our daily routines. However, if it is one of the Venetian species then that brings myriad of challenges.
When I lend cash to the Venetians I usually write it off as a bad debt for though they always promise to pay it back, they never do. I don’t know whether when they say that they will repay and they don’t, do they think about the effects? For me my trust in then corrodes and I can never lend them money again. Funny enough they never do get back to asking me for help again. Well there are three exceptions to that story.
First, my mother is one of those who love saying they’ll pay me back. However, she never does and yet she still has the audacity to ask me for more and claim she’ll pay it back. Sigh, I hate that cycle but because she is my mother, I never bother thinking about it.
Next is the only Venetian that I know keeps her word. When she asks for cash from me I will actually move heaven and earth to help her. She is trustworthy when it comes to money matters. Incidentally she is a very close friend I made eight years back.
The last exception is another friend I made two to three years back. Well she trusts me a lot though I wonder why. Well my first approach was I had a crush on her, but she had already been taken by someone else so I gave up. However, out of her insight and intuition she kept me close as a friend. She views me as her elder brother always there to help her out. Though I usually act aloof and cold to her she still cherishes me. Anyway she is the only one who is truthful when asking for money, she usually tells me that “I might not be able to pay back any time soon”.. I like her brutal honesty and because of that I will help her out.
Maybe I should just get back to my previous state where I at least could say the truth that I have no money/can’t help out.
Until next time, signing out.

Of Personal Space as an Introverted Deity

“If currency was abolished…..” Man, Money and Mannerism by Dr. Nnekwa

This being is a troubled being. Other than my SPIRIT Beam not working, other than still being stuck on this planet, other than having to,find a job to,maintain my gigai, I have to put up with violation and invasion of my personal space.

Everyone has a certain space that they consider Holy of Holies. Its radius might be as long as the Great Wall of China for we introverts or as narrow as the space between the nucleus and the innermost energy level of an atom for our polar opposites and extreme sided nexus mates; extroverts. Either way we all have that personal sphere surrounding us where we wouldn’t want any Tom Dick or Harriette to cross into.

For most if not all, that personal space is usually physical in nature. However, for me as the Deity of the Universe of Infinite, my personal space isn’t limited to the physical aspect only. Yes I detest skinship of many types more so PDA (see previous post). Don’t get me wrong, this Deity doesn’t want to be clubbed in with the OCD and neat freak perfectionists. On the contrary I have HTL for most things -High Tolerance Levels. As a Deity I know that it is next to impossible for my gigai not to physically interact with you beings. Therefore I have an almost non-existent physical personal space.

However, please don’t jump the gun and assume I am an extrovert. I have stratified zones that not even my HTL can accommodate for any intrusion. Following the Universal Law of Balance aka as Give and Take, where I am lacking in personal space I make up with it hundredfold in other areas. My next to nil PPS is replaced by my APS- Abstract Personal Space. In this case APS includes but not limited to Emotional, Intellectual, Spiritual and Moral spaces. Abstract because these spaces can’t be touched nor felt physically..

My gigai is adept in extrapolation using scatter points available in any scenario. Today my rant and rave as Deity of the Universe of Infinite is going to touch on the Moral and Ethical Personal Space – MEPS.

Yes I get it, you are all proud of your lineage to a certain tribe. Wow! Yay! Hooray! If that’s the case then let me also tell you how special my gigai is I mean it is the only one that descended from Adam and Eve. Pshaw! Go eat a blade and hang. Don’t forcefeed me your baseless tribal pride. In one of my posts I mentioned having joined a new workplace. Well I found myself in an uncharted waters and though you humans say, when you go to Romania do as the Romanians do (or something like that); I disagree.

To begin with, following the unhealthy and negative effects that being tribal in certain places brings, I am never interested to know your tribe. Let is get that straight as a light ray!. I will reiterate, I bloody don’t care what tribe you are. I might or might not have a few preferential tribes and funny enough the tribe of my gigai is one that I personally don’t care about so I am not loyal to it. You’ll catch me dead looking for my gigai’s countrymen. Tribe however is never a factor for me when choosing my acquaintances, associates, friends nor enemies. It is your personality that will determine into which category you’ll be placed. Therefore I entreat you to please respect my MEPS; the same way I don’t ask your tribe please don’t try to ask mine.

Here at my current workplace, within the first week, every Tom Dick and Harriette tried to know my tribe either directly or indirectly. The direct ones ask what trobe I am and I tell them I’m a city slicker. Proudly born and raised in the city. Others tried to ask my parents birthplace and I tell them they both are city kids. For the indirect,ones they would ask what my full name is. When I introduce myself I usually give my first name only. So they think they are smart enough to ask my surname. Unfortunately for them my surname wont give you even a hint of my tribe. I thank my mum for my first name- most people think I am English because of it. I thank the government for misspelling my middle name because now it sound Russian. Finally I thank my dad for his surname because it isn’t even African in nature.

With that said, I hear some of you saying Tha I am not proud of my tribe. I say go hang!. Yes my tribal cocoon isn’t my forte. To begin with I don’t know my,mother tongue and I am proud of that. Yes in this modern world there are lingua franca that help in development; English, French, Italian, Mandarin, Swahili, German and let us not forget my favourite Japanese et al. The world is a global village and using mother tongue to communicate will only work back at your villages. Following the Law of Balance, when my mother tongue was discarded, my English had a chance to rapidly improve and interest in other languages was born. Right now I’m into Nippo.

Let us be real, you just want to know my tribe for your evil intentions. I hope 2007 hasn’t been forgotten. Of my Deity powers could work here id male everyone learn and speak in Latin. The 18th-20th Century education systems had it right by including Latin in their curriculum. Latin would be the de facto language. Your persistent tribal questions encroach on my MEPS.. If you want to be tribal please keep me out of it. I believe nakama are more important than tribe after all don’t you humans say that there exists a friend sticking closer than a sister- or something like that?

The next time a primitive primordial Neanderthal asks me for my tribe, I’ll grunt back at him/her; punch the inquirer in the face or bat my eyelashes like a damsel at the person while sweetly saying, “Wouldn’t you like to know?”. It will depend on my mood at the moment. Unfortunately some people in my close circle are tribal to am extent but I usually turn a deaf eye and blind ear to their remarks. My mission isn’t to change your tribal perspectives bit in the same way don’t encroach on MEPS virgin land..
Signing off until next rant and rave this is a Disconcerted Free Deity of the Universe of Infinite and Tribeless Man of the People..

Of New Work Environment

Well as you might be well aware, my SPIRIT Beam is still dysfunctional at the moment so I’m still stuck in this gigai for now. Hence, I am pushed to the point where I have to get a job, I order to sustain my gigai conditions- talk about a cow holding a tick hostage.. Anyway, since that is the case, this Deity of the Universe of Infinite has got himself one..

Don’t get me wrong I have nothing against working or such but I am a deity, need I say more?. Well the environment is totally different from what I expected.. The people are new to me and such busybodies trying to get me talk to them. I hate that part.

I got this job quite a while back and have been watching things closely from my end. I can’t complain much but I wish the folks would stop trying to give Pinocchio competition with their long noses.

I came to work. Not to dilly dally, shilly shally nor have repartee with anyone. And I definitely didn’t come to make friends nor look for a prospective consort. I stress on the last statement because of some events that happened to me earlier on.

On the first day of work a male workmate when introducing himself to me in front of a female workmate told me to keep off the ladies. The lady retaliated and said, “Chinko stop spoiling my CV, I am single and searching.” Now was there any need to explain that. Wouldn’t a simple retort like,”I’m not yours” or “I’m single,” do quite well?. My relation with the Venetian Species shows that the species will never say they are single and especially that they are searching even if the case is true on either/both counts. I was left with questions afterwards as to why she would say that.

Also another male colleague had a chat with me and asked if I was married.. Of late I keep getting this question?. Does my gigai issue a pheromone to show it is ready for marriage?. Or is it an age where it should be married?. I’m sorry but I definitely ain’t marrying at this age nor on this planet. Besides the workmate even reached the point of telling me the few available ladies at work that are suitable candidates. Another workmate was shocked to learn I am not married. What’s the big deal?. Marry when ready..

Or are people jealous of my freedom? I mean living alone and having no family responsibilities is fun and no one forced you to marry early. All I know is that this deity isn’t marrying anyone anytime soon. So if you want to eat a blade because of jealousy go ahead, I definitely will not stop you

As for friends, nope not interested, for there is really no real friendship material at work. Or at least I haven’t identified any friends of present. The people around either are too immature in their mindset or just have polar opposite mindset from this deity. The best I have are nodding acquaintances..

Until next time, work safe
From a Working Class Deity, Man of the People and Deity of the Universe of Infinite..

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