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Posts tagged ‘depression’

My Thoughts on Depression

Depression. Who would have thought that such a mature or grown up disease would trickle down to me?. I am neither old nor mature.. I think this diseases are lacking moving targets. I’m sure next someone would tell me I have type a diabetes and cancer.. Lemme be a traditional African and say that these illnesses are for the rich and the whites..
Away from that, someone told me that I am suffering from depression.. Well I don’t know about that but I do know myself better than anyone else does.. So depression? Nuh uh.. For the sake of argument though lemme agree to that statement..
Now why would I be depressed?. Is it because of late I prefer lazing in the house and not going out? Or is it my sudden lack of enthusiasm in what I used to love doing?. Or is it my lethargic nature?. Answer to the first question is, I’m an introvert. As am introvert my me time is next to none. It is held at a glorious perch away from other activities that would ordinarily taint it. According to Darwin, evolution takes place so I evolved from whatever I was to a hikikomori.. Besides, it is only at my home that I cam get in touch with my inner self and have discussions, debates, arguments, word duels in a safe place away from judging eyes and ears.
Question two, the answer is its a phase. Didn’t we all pass through certain phases in life?. I know I didn’t and that’s why they are catching up to me now.. Yes I loved drawing, I loved reading, I loved writing, loved animals, basically I LOVED.. Emphasis on the word loved. But they were all passing phases, leaving me mainly an empty shell.. Ah well, something new shall fill the vacuum..
Lastly, yeah I had high and still do have high energy levels. Its just that these days, my primary reserves have dwindled to dangerously low levels. As to my back up reserves, they are just that, back up. Besides why would I need energy when all I do is stay in the house?. My mental energy is more than enough to push me through the day..
Yes I can hear you quite clearly. He is in the first stage, denial. Anyway that is just your opinion which fortunately doesn’t count in this universe. Well even if you are right, what do I do?. Talk to a close family member?. Well me and family aren’t bed mates you know.. A friend, you suggest?. Everyone has there own problems, so no one really gives a hoot about you silly problems.. More so in this age and era.. A professional, do I hear?. Well as the name suggests, it wont be for free, besides why spend that money on a professional while I can just Google the cure?. Anyway even if I did have someone to talk to, all other factors withstanding, lets just say that my defensive nature will kick in; namely introvert nature.. Why would I tell you my problems?. Am I sick?. I think this is the only time I accept that I will be depressed, talking my heart out. What a laugh.. I will leave that to my fellow subjective species the extroverts. For me lemme just rant and rave in a round about manner and get the calm I desire.. Till next time.. Take care and don’t be depressed..
PS, this was just for argument purposes. I am not depressed.. A depressed person wouldn’t be as lively as radioactive potassium ion..

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